Kristin Hurtig

The Greatest Pain of All

You’re going through the motions.

Keep moving forward.

This we know:

even if its on auto pilot for a few,

there are bills that need to be paid,

people to help–

you need to keep moving forward.

Why do we try to prepare?

It just makes it harder,

grieving twice–

once while they are still hanging on,

then again when they leave. 

Going through the motions.

Show up for work

Go for a run,


Beat it– 

don’t let it overcome you. 

We’ve been told that the pain and hurt will lessen over time, 

but the pain remains, comes

sometimes when we least expect it.

You need to keep moving forward.

A Modge Podge

A little country,

A little rebellion,

A little city,

It’s bit laughable actually,

Though not really too inconceivable

To be all that wrapped in one.

We are whimsical infants,

Energetic toddlers,

Outrageous adolescents,

Crazy adults trying to escape the storm;

As adults we fossick through this modge podge we call life.

We grow up fast,

We go through so much,

All kinds of troubles,

Some make it through without a scratch,

Others end up with scars, lost, and confused;

We lose some, we gain some,

While loving, and hating people,

Trusting, and not trusting,

Life is hard,

No one said it was gonna be easy,

There is no easy,

If it were easy, it’s not living,

You’re not learning, if you’re not living;

Life will knock you down,

Trying to keep you down,

The trick is to get back up,

Dust yourself off and drive on;

Life throws detritus at around,

We just have to throw it back,

Stand up, fight, rise above it,

Hate and fear are killers,

So much of it today,

It’s not like it used to be,

How did this happen?

We may get flummoxed and sometimes

Have gastrointestinal aches,

Then again those aches might be from

Masticating a mickle bag of chocolate miniatures the night before.

Looking in the mirror,

Looking out the window,

Wondering where the time went,

We’ve been told over the years to have patience

Because one day we’re gonna miss those days before;

Thinking back now,

Those were organic days that we can never get back,

All those petty things in high school,

All the trouble we gave our parents,

Seem just that, petty;

Trying to justify it then and still at times wondering if it is justified,

The way we were then,

It’s been justified then, and now,

It’s in the past, it’s done.

Diamonds, they may be forever, they may sparkle;

However, they can dull like everything else, unless you keep them polished;

They will bring on dread and invoke a bunch of not so rational thinking,

Though at the time, it may seem like it is rational,

All I want is simplicity.

Rocking on the porch,

Glass of bourbon in hand,

Memories flooding the mind,

Some of those memories are ferocious,

Induced by too much bourbon, no doubt;

However, the amber color, the smooth taste,

Makes it so extravagant,

Although in reality, it’s just artificially making it look extravagant;

Hoping the bourbon would extract the pain,

Though it doesn’t, it only subdued it for awhile.

I am not a vengeful person;

However, don’t cross me, or anyone I love,

You will pay,

Do not mistake my niceness for weakness or being discombobulated

Because I will persevere through,

And passionately about it;

I don’t let the storm get me down,

If it shall knock me down, I’ll stand back up wearing my crown,

Eating some scrumptious chocolate,

Waiting for the coffee percolating in the percolator.

Life can be full of erotic magic, majestic moments,

Delicious love making as well,

All so smiley,

Living in freedom, though feeling scarce;

Therefore, making moot of it,

Some vamoose through life,

Without enjoying the sunshine.

The anticipation gets to me with indecision,

Smashing the puppets,

I am relentless,

I am strong,

I will persevere,

Yet full of grief,

Sometimes not very grateful,

Disgusted that the giraffe tries to be better

Than the wildebeest.

A new revolution breaks loose,

I escape the emptiness,

It’s inspiring to go camping,

Making memories,

By the campfire,

While eating potato chips, and drinking a brewski.

The fairy godmother is not here to wave her wand

Nor to extend majestic dust upon us,

Instead there is no fairy godmother, only chaos and confusion;

I must splurge in an hour and try not to misinterpret my life

For the vulgar bulbous.

I fankle to the extremity to be dependent yet independent

At the same time,

While the grim reaper keeps moving through the darkness,

Knocking on the door,

Making sure his presence is known,

Making sure his grievous, grandiose, move onto his next soul;

I the poet keep on persevering forward,

I remain the hopeless romantic, that always looks to the winsome

Side of life;

My senses put me into survival mode;

Therefore, being wanton.

The hometown hero,

Just got home from the desert,

Using a sense of wry to cope,

Hearing the boom now and again,

Startling to the mind,

Dazed and confused for a minute,

Then back to the present,

So uncanny, not keeping score

Just did the job and proudly;

The motor running from the Humvee,

Eating a banana,

Knowing they are all expendable and deserving of deliverance;

In the desert being ascerbic, guarding the Zanzibar,

Not being maudlin.

The entui holds the collection of trinkets, that were collected

Over the years on the spangled wall of shelves;

In which is like true love,

The love I feel for you is soulfully,

Our love is endless;

The motor of my heart is beating rapidly,

The feeling of santosha in my life since you,

There’s no where else to go except for up,

Taking a walk on this brisk autumn evening;

The rumbly sound of the winnow going through the dark night,

It’s not catastrophic;

In remembrance, supine under the night sky,

Contemplating the wonders of life;

Ambling down the road,

Taking it all in with the notification of love and life,

Knowing I am alive,

Is a blessed feeling,

That no one can extract from me,

Not even the ghosts in the night,

Hearing the sounds of the night,

A thud in the woods,


It sounded like, but nothing…




an existential,

an antsy, lonely,


yet delicious,

full of struggle,

trying to be passionate,

thrive and strive,

fly without a rerun,

using your intuition,

trying not to get too exhausted,

yet staying faithful and loved,

not an easy task,

trying to adapt,

feeling lost and discombobulated,

can make us feel so tired,

though we still find the energy,

and so eager and full of new innovation,

and finding the courage, ignoring the disconnect of others,

the flirtations that are among us and try to distract us,

our scars are not meant to hurt us,

but to remind us and to teach us,

sometimes it’s so hard not to be redundant and create new scars,

and watch everything unravel into a fuzzy,

a confusion of a mess,

waiting for the risen,

to take place,

to trust, and not to divide,

be committed and not incoherent or incomparable,

but to be sustainable,

and humbled, full of hope and feel awake,

to feel at peace without,

too much frustration, and disruption,

again and again,

to not be so destructive to oneself,

to feel content with yourself,

indulge once in awhile,

don’t get hysterical,

engulf your passion inside of you,

take charge,

don’t fear change,

be all that you can endure and more,

visibility of the future,

reflection of the past,

delight that you are here and alive,

without the chaos of others,

feel nostalgic at times,

don’t think it’s a burden,

to feel the sense to gravitate towards truth,

and wisdom,

honor His love,

have personal courage to move forward,

chivalry is not dead,

sometimes we need a segway,

so we don’t become transparent,

and gloomy, so we can make progress,

it’s the quality, not quantity,

make it count, make it ceremonial,

make it a savvy one,

don’t swindle it away,

make it epic,

full of roses,

use your endurance and then some,

persevere through it,

be a soldier of it,

don’t be constricted,

be glorious, satisfied,

with the rumbling of more in the pit of your stomach,

striving for more,

almost euphoric,

not a blemish, but an orgasm,

we all get into a funk,

and sometimes makes us feel sick,

but we are surrounded by love,

so holler for more longevity,

be tenacious,

it’s a big, blank canvas,

your canvas,

no room for miscommunication,

in this wide open space,

dig deep within your soul,

don’t go off on a tangent or do so,

it’s yours to do whatever you want,

try not to feel drained,

feel hopeful instead,

feel the overflow,

the abundant amount of love,

be romantic,

care about all the glimmer,

let go of the stress,

see the beauty,

have some redemption,

be decisive,


be joyful,




love unconditional,

don’t say good-bye,

cleanse your soul,

entice others,

heal shattered hearts,

drink bourbon,

it can be frantic at times,

some may lose a little blood,

we may feel undesirable,

but be relentless,

be quirky, never mind what others may say,

its only turbulence,

we all have fears of abandonment and distrust,

but it is futile,

a mute point,

it doesn’t matter,

cause where we’re going is a place of peace,

only in the beginning,

we feel insecure,

full of procrastination,

release the drama,

live vigorous,


with integrity and honor,

in remembrance of where we’ve been,

without resistance to where we’re going,

don’t be sadistic,

remember the consequences,

clarity of what’s next,

remember how it feels to be broken,

it would behoove you,



have morals,

there isn’t much time left,

honor your mom, your children, and your spouse,

be at peace,

we are not finished yet,

this is only the narrative,

we haven’t reached the conclusion,

I know it’s complicated,

but hang on,

the finale is coming,

it’s not bogus,

we have botched things up along the way,

we are only human,

we were born,

for a reason, a purpose,

feel the hunger,

be fierce, not a coward,

it’s not a conspiracy,

there is no separation,

only freedom,



therefore, be a witness,

don’t be suspicious,

drink some coffee,

smile, be content and enjoy the waiting,

learn from the distressing moments,

don’t be overbearing,

don’t worry about being unstable,

that’s becoming the new “norm”,

there will be thunderstorms along the way,

and even be a bit congested at times,

you might even be betrayed too,

but regroup,

even be a little arrogant and maybe a little steamy

and presumptuous too,

don’t let anyone or anything get you down,

admire yourself, others too if you so desire,

sweat a little,

smile, laugh, and most of all breathe,

take your time and live,

because one day this will be all gone,


58 Days

58 days with you,

Opening your home, your heart,

Singing for us,

Sharing your life with us,

Feeling like we know you even more,

We are family,

Though we are strangers,

We are family,

We understand,

You understand us,

Teaching us,

Loving us,

As we love you,

Therefore we,

grieving along, side of you,

we don’t know you,

yet we feel like we do,

we are feeling your loss, 

as if you were our best friend,

You have been so open with us

Through your music, 

And especially these last 58 days

Of opening her home, heart, sharing, and singing, 

Sharing her life with us during these crazy times we are living.

As we first heard of your son’s death,

We were in shock, 


It made us sad,

Tears came rushing to the surface,

It was like losing the son of our best friend.

The first 24 hours, 

The pain flowed through veins,

Several days later,

We still feel the heartache,

Grieving along side you and your family.

Hearing such news,

Triggers something inside us,

Bringing all hurt flooding back,

Causing us to grieve a little all over again,

We will be ok,

as we listen to your music.

It soothes the soul,

Brings peace to our hearts.

Be Strong,

Speak True,

Spread The Peace,

Choose Only Love.